I’m writing down these thoughts for the love and memory of these people: Iñigo Garcia & Melenciana Valbuena, Roberto Galvez & Angelina Gutierrez.
I did not grow up with grandparents around. My paternal grandparents Iñing and Miling migrated to the States in the early 80s. Lolo Iñing took his last breath in Uncle Sam’s soil. I was still very small so I never had a chance to meet him personally.
Meanwhile, my Lola Angeling passed away before I could even speak clearly. My mom said she loves to cook and would often sing with me, “Sana’y Wala Nang Wakas…” I guess that was the first song I learned singing at barely 2 years old. Lolo Ruben passed away when I was just starting to make fun childhood memories. I’d always remember him as someone who’s hair was always fixed with what they say “pamada” or hair gel.
Lola Miling, Lolo Ining’s best half stayed almost all her life in America. She died on October 13th 2011, when she succumbed to Blood Cancer. She’d come to visit us here in Manila every now and then when she was still alive.
My lola’s remains in Oakdale Memorial Park & Mortuary, CA
(Photo courtesy of my cousin, CJH via Instagram)
Yes, I barely know these people I called grandparents even though my roots are from them. I would be a hypocrite if I say that I am so affected with their loss, when in reality I am slightly not. But I don’t think that fact makes a bad and an ungrateful grandchild, do I? Everything happens for a reason. Why did God give me this circumstance? I am still asking Him for answers.
I wasn’t given a chance to grieve for them. I don’t think I even shed a single tear when they died. Yes, I feel sad but the mere fact that I never really gotten the chance to KNOW them. Surely if I did, I’d have a different story to tell.
At Home: Lola’s last vacation in Manila, 2009
So now my question is, how do you remember a memory when you couldn’t even remember anything? How do you honor the memories when you only shared very little? I am truly grateful to God because Noa still enjoys the love and presence of both my and her Daddy’s parents. For the first time, I feel envious of Noa in a good way. I am glad that she got that one thing I never had.
When all is said and done, nothing changes the fact that their blood runs in me. I hope one day, someday, I would be given a chance to share a simple chance to meet them up in the clouds in the so-called eternity. One day, just like what Eric Clapton sung, they would still know my name, Glaiza, their grandchild, once we meet in heaven. I hope it’s not too late for us to get to know and hug each other in heaven. Heaven is my only hope.
“Death leaves a heartache no one can heal;
love leaves a memory no one can steal.”
Remembering the love and honoring the memory of Iñing, Miling, Ruben and Angeling, my beloved lolos and lolas. ♥